“I miss the way her butt smelled. It was an angry smell, but I miss it.”
“I know this is hard on you, Friz.” Brigitte squeezed the dog’s shoulders tight. “But Moose is only going away for a little bit. She’ll be back.”
“You sound like Dad talking, but you’re worried, too.” Friz huffed, then leaned into Brigitte. “Dad was mad at her. I told her not to eat those leaves. I remember when I ate those leaves and Dad was so mad at me too.”
“You made a really big mess after you ate them, Friz. It was a baaad mess.”
“It wasn’t my fault! They made my tummy soooooo…” Friz whined.
Brigitte scratched Friz’s ears until his eyes closed and the whining stopped. “Remember, even though Dad was mad, he just took you to the vet, and they fixed you. You came back.” The sound of tires on pavement peaked Friz’s ears, and he pressed his nose against the window, but it was just the neighbors pulling into their driveway. “You’ve been to the vet a lot of times. So has Moose,” Brigitte said. “You always come home.”
“When he took Mom to the vet, she didn’t come home.”
“I know. I don’t remember, though.”
“You were just a tiny puppy, but I remember. I usually liked the way Mom’s butt smelled, too. Except, she smelled sad when she left.”
“I think probably butts always smell a little sad,” Brigitte said, nose wrinkled.
“That’s just silly. That’s how I know you’re still a puppy, even though you’re a big puppy.” Friz stared intently into Brigitte’s eyes. “Butts smell all sorts of ways, and they are not actually sad very often. Mom’s butt was sad when she left, and so was Dad’s. Your grandma’s butt was sad too when they left. I think hers smelled more hopeful than Mom or Dad’s though. Yours was just poopy.”
“I was a poopy puppy,” Brigitte said, then giggled and fell over laughing. The laughs faded quickly. “I think I’m worried too.” Brigitte sat up straight, and she looked very serious into Friz’s eyes. “I shouldn’t be worried. You always-always go crazy thinking everyone will never come back, even when they just go to work or to school. You always-always think they’re going to be gone forever, again and again and again. They never are. They always come back.”
“They almost always come back.”
“I think I need Moose to come back. I think Dad is still hurt about Mom. I can’t imagine him not having you and me and Moose.”
“Moose is horrible, but she does purr very nice when she’s not clawing me.”
“I think I need you and Moose.” Brigitte leaned in close to Friz and wrapped her arms around him so hard that it hurt. He wasn’t the puppy he once was, years ago when that newly married couple saw him at the shelter. That was a lot of people-years ago, and a lot more dog-years ago. He knew that it wouldn’t be very long before he went to the vet with Dad and Dad came home alone and Brigitte’s butt would smell sad for a long time. But who would be there to smell that sadness? The hug hurt his old bones, but he didn’t whimper. “I need you and Moose and Dad,” Brigitte whispered.
“I know you do, puppy.”
Friz’s ears peaked again as another set of tires made their gravelly approach. There it was, the car that had left forever ago with an angry and sick cat. There was Dad getting out of the car and bringing a wriggling cat carrier towards the house. Friz could see Moose’s ears poking out of the front of the carrier, and could just barely hear the mournful yowling. Oh, Moose’s butt is going to smell SO angry! Friz wagged his tail as Brigitte rushed to the front door and he sauntered after her, slower than he might have when he was a puppy, but not too slow. There would be at least a couple more years of smelling angry cat butt, and he was excited to enjoy them.
–END
Author’s Note: I wrote this in honor of my family’s current pets (Fizzle, Taggle, and Poseidon) and the ones we’ve lost (Ranger, Papoo, and Linay.) Pets are so important to our lives, but as grown-ups we can get distracted by all the other important things in life. I love the idea of the innocence of a pet dog and his love/hate for the pet cat, and the slightly wiser innocence of the little girl who loves them both. I wanted to look at a tough conversation between them, and just experiment with how that conversation might go.
Copyright 2024 Abram Dress